Have you ever thought about what an amazing gift our memories are? Just for a minute, let yourself drift back into your favorite childhood memories. What did you see? How did you feel? Did you notice any favorite aromas from the past?

Cookies Then, Cookies Today

I remember eating my Mom’s homemade chocolate chip cookies. Whenever we kids caught a whiff of cookies baking, we would come running into the kitchen! We knew that soon, we’d be sitting around the table together, giggling with delight as we devoured those delicious treats, still warm from the oven.

So let me ask you a question. Based on the memory I just shared, yes or no: do you believe I still like chocolate chip cookies today? Of course, I do! I have a long history of happy interactions with chocolate chip cookies.

Not all of my memories are pleasant, however. I also remember being corrected for various childish misbehaviors. I learned quickly which behaviors to avoid! Although those memories are less enjoyable, they still serve a valuable function to this day.

Memories Shape Expectations

Because it turns out, our memories aren’t only about the past. They’re also about the future! Our memories enable our brains to predict what’s coming up next. “If this one thing happens, I already know what happens next. So I know what to do.”

If I smell cookies baking, I can predict that soon I’ll be eating one – and it will be wonderful! And if I act out, soon I’ll be experiencing the consequences of my poor choices. That’s just the way life works, and it’s my memories that tell me so.

I was about nine or 10 years old when I learned to ride a bike. No training wheels for this girl! After getting me properly seated and with my feet on the pedals, Dad gave my bike a mighty shove. For me, it felt like “pedal or die!”

This was long before helmets and knee pads entered the scene; so it was just me, my bike, and the pavement.

I’m still here, so I didn’t die, but I did have a crash or two or three. Then I got the hang of it, and bike riding became one of my favorite pastimes.

Today, when I think of those times, what I remember is cruising the neighborhood with my fingers wrapped around the handlebars and the breeze on my face. I haven’t owned a bike in years, but the idea of riding one is still pleasant for me, as my positive memories predict great times ahead.

What’s truly amazing is how our brains do this without our even realizing it! Decades after that first warm homemade cookie with my family, those happy memories mean I’m still a sucker for a cookie fresh from the oven. (Or even fresh from the package, as the case may be.) And when I think of that old bike now, I don’t even remember the skinned knees. I’m too busy reliving all the fun I had and that feeling of “I can do it!”

The Emotion Connection

Naturally, our memories are stored in our brain’s built-in memory files. Your brain’s filing system is vast and sophisticated. And here’s where it gets really interesting: memories are filed not only by topic but also by emotion. So my childhood cookies were filed under “delight” and “love” as well as “dessert.”

Learning to ride my bike was also filed under several emotions: “nervous” and “excited” and “proud.” So now when I’m nervous about stepping into a new situation, I’ll bet my brain checks the files and finds this memory – which also connects with feeling able to learn new things and achieve new goals. I wonder how many times that has bolstered my courage as I started a new school year or on my first day at a new job? Probably every time, and I never even knew it.

Memories Navigate Our Choices

I hope you can see how much care God put into designing us to form memories, not only for our enjoyment of the past but also to help us navigate the present and the future. Let me share another story so we can look at that more closely.  

I have always loved dogs. When I was growing up, my family and friends often had pets, and I enjoyed playing with them. So when I see a dog, my reaction is to feel that “Dogs are fun! I want to pet that dog!” In addition, my dad had taught me what to do if I ever faced an aggressive dog. “Never run from a dog!” he would say. “That will trigger its reflexes. So even if the dog hadn’t intended to chase you, it will anyway if you run from it.” So I felt comfortable and confident around dogs, even strange dogs I didn’t know.

One day when I was about ten or twelve years old, I was stopped by a large dog while walking down the street. A neighbor boy was nearby, so we both encountered this snapping, lunging dog at the same time. Because my experiences and training had been positive, I stayed calm as the dog approached me. I never turned my back on him; I just slowly backed away. After a minute or so of this, the dog lost interest in me and turned to the other child.

Unfortunately, my neighbor did not have the same positive memories that I had concerning dogs, and he was terrified. As the boy began running as fast as he could, I shouted, “Stop running! Stop!” The frightened boy shot me a look that said, “You’re crazy!” and kept running. But the dog was faster, and he was gaining on the boy. I kept shouting and the boy kept running, but he soon realized he was not going to outrun that dog.

Defeated, he suddenly stopped running and turned to face his pursuer. Just as suddenly, the dog also stopped. The dog stared at the boy for a few seconds, then turned and walked away. My young neighbor was utterly astounded. He’d been sure he was about to become dog food, and instead that dog had simply walked away.

So what happened here? Why did two children facing the same situation have opposite responses? The boy’s memories of dogs caused him to predict that “all dogs are dangerous” and he should run. Whereas my reaction was that “this dog seems unfriendly, so I’ll be careful.”

My positive memories caused my brain to predict very different outcomes than the other child, and that enabled me to act differently. Thank goodness, I was also able help my neighbor feel safe, and maybe even change how he viewed dogs in the future.

What about Negative Memories?

So what happens when our brain’s amazing memory system works against us? Just like my neighbor running from the dog, we have all experienced it. Facing something new, even if it’s good, can feel daunting. We may begin hearing negative voices in our heads, telling us all the reasons why we can’t have what we want or can’t achieve our goals and dreams.

When we hear these voices, it’s really our own brains drawing upon memories of other times we felt the same way, and making predictions that things won’t go well. Your brain’s job is to keep you safe – so it’s always on the lookout for anything it deems “unsafe,” including uncomfortable emotions. Our brains mean well, but sometimes they try to protect us a little too much!

As a result, we might be tempted to back out of great opportunities or never even seek them out in the first place. For instance, let’s say Michelle has a dream of becoming a nurse. But she hears that little voice saying, “You don’t have the money for that!” Next, she hears, “Are you sure you’re smart enough? It sure would be embarrassing to flunk out!” Or what about this one: “You don’t have time for school – you have a family to raise!” Michelle’s heart is telling her that a career in nursing could be a great idea for her, but that one little part of her brain is telling her all the reasons why she can’t succeed.

What to do? Some people try to drown out their negative voices with “positive thinking.” This takes a lot of energy, because those negative thoughts are still speaking up loud and clear. Eventually, most people get too exhausted to keep fighting, and end up giving in to their negative voices and feelings. I’m all for positive thinking, but sometimes we need something more.

Sometimes people take other approaches, such as distracting themselves in various ways, maybe with entertainment, overworking, or maybe even a wild lifestyle. Again, the negative voices and feelings are still there. Just like that big dog my neighbor and I faced, you can’t outrun them.

Is there any hope? Yes, there is! God designed our brains to work this way for our benefit. But He also knew there would be situations in which our brains might hold us back just when we need them to cheer us on. So God designed us with the ability to dissolve our negative thoughts and feelings and clear the charges connected with negative memories.

Finding Fresh Hope

One way that I know of involves our sense of smell. In our brains, our memory files work hand-in-hand with both our sense of smell and with the part of the brain that decides whether we’re in danger. And it so happens that some aromas are very calming to our brains.

Knowing this, Dr. Benjamin Perkus (a Christian psychologist) invented a process that uses certain aromas in a specialized way to dissolve our negative voices and feelings. As a result, his clients felt renewed encouragement and energy for pursuing their dreams and goals. Dr. Perkus named his cutting-edge process the “Aroma Freedom Technique.”

Dr. Perkus recognized that the world desperately needs Aroma Freedom, but he’s only one person. That’s when he created a program to train others to use Aroma Freedom professionally, so that as many people as possible would have access to it.

By the way, as a Certified Practitioner myself, I love using Aroma Freedom to help others who are feeling “stuck” and desire to be able to move forward again. My clients have described our sessions as “amazing” and several have been kind enough to say that I have a gift for this. If you’re curious, visit my website at http://tania-brown.com.

Quick Aroma Boost

Would you like to try an experiment? Here’s something you can do at home. Get a fresh orange and grate a small amount of the peel. Or get out some cinnamon sticks or a strong-smelling organic herbal teabag (such as peppermint tea).

Now, think back to an unpleasant memory, maybe a time when you felt sad, frightened, or angry. Get a mental picture of the memory, or maybe a “movie” of several connected memories. Notice what negative voices come to mind. Then notice your primary emotion and name it as a one-word feeling (such as angry, sad, or apprehensive).

Then notice where you feel this in your body (maybe you feel a tight chest, clenched jaw, or your stomach hurts). While focusing on the mental picture, the main emotion, and where you feel it in your body, smell the freshly grated orange peel, cinnamon stick, or organic teabag. Breathe it in and notice what happens.

You may feel your shoulders relax. The mental picture may fade away or change. The emotion may intensify, change, or fade away. You might even try this several times, each time addressing a different emotion connected with the memory.

After the negative memory fades and you regain a neutral state of mind, then smell the orange peel or other aromas again. What do you notice? Does a positive memory spring to mind? Or perhaps your emotions receive a boost? This simple activity may help you experience the power of using your sense of smell to influence your thoughts and emotions in a positive direction.

Do you see now what a gift your memories are? I hope that you’ve gained an appreciation for how memories of the past, whether recently or long ago, can help you navigate your present and future. I encourage you to practice noticing your thoughts, feelings, and your body’s reactions throughout the day. That’s a great first step towards working with them in a positive, healing way.

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